So, I’ve been struggling with issues of acceptance again. Guess one never really truly gets over it. I know back in high school I always wanted to fit in and just for some reason never really did, at least thats my perception. I have tons of friends or for the most part: Acquitances. If you were to look at my Facebook you’d see a large list of people that I “know”. There are few that really “know” me. I have people that I work closely with at my job and church, but yet in many ways I feel light years apart. I’m around people almost constantly. I’m a people person. I know it drives my wife nuts becuase there are times when we need to just be home and be family, but there is a stir in me to be active and out and about around other people.
So whats my problem? Do I not feel accepted? Am I just not content? Its honestly a deep deep question. I can only hit some of it on the head.
I think that first and foremost I have always felt that I did not quite fit into any particular group of people. There were always people who let me be around, tag along, or in my head “put up with me”. And I think I still feel this way. I know that some of it has to do with my personality, my way of getting work done, and my desire to do things to my best and learn from my experiences. I crave feedback to know that what I’m doing is right, that others notice me, and that well….. I’m liked. I know that we all need to feel loved, accepted, liked…….. What I’m about to say is stinking hard to heard, to accept and to live by, but know what………. IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT GOD THINKS!…. and He gave His only son for me, so I better accept it, God Loves me, Likes me, Accepts me…..
So I think it comes down to contentment. I have to learn to accept where I’m at, my situation, my life. God will bring the people into my life that I need… I know He already has with certain people that are special to me for different reasons (ie. my wife, my daughter, Remy, Joe, Andy, Dave, Chad a vendor I deal with…..) So i know that people do like me and accept me as me. So whats my problem? I guess being content with those people God has put in my life and not feeling that people I work with have to be “good friends” or beyond the acquintance level. I have to accept that I can only truly handle so many close friends. If you ask my wife, our schedules are busy crazy…. and becuase of it I haven’t been able to nurture the deep friendships I have, the ones that I really need to, the ones that help energize me and give me life to live each and every day.
So What do “I” need to do?
1. Learn to take joy in other peoples opportunities to venture out, network and have a good time…. my turn will come in due time….
2. See the networking tools I use as a blessing to see what God is doing around the world, and not a place for jealousy.
3. Learn to be content with where God has put me!
4. Pour into the relationships that matter, the one’s God is truly calling me to care about!
So what have you learned?
Are you content?
Are you building those up around you? Even those acquitance/peer/associate relationships around you?
Are you seeking approval form man or from GOD?
Take some time to sit back and thank God for what He has given you, to give you contentment and find joy in that which He has provided. Its not about US all the time. Its all about Him.
To those around me….. Thanks for your patience…. Being human in this broken world is messy….